The Value of Kindness Online and Offline

Sarah Kendrick from the leading children’s mental health charity Place2Be, explains how encouraging children to be kind, both online and in person, can help to improve their emotional wellbeing.

Peer pressure, keeping up with schoolwork, staying safe and happy online: navigating social, academic and digital pressures can place a strain on the emotional wellbeing of children and young people. Official stats say that one in ten has a diagnosable mental health issue, and many more may struggle to cope with life’s ups and downs.

Modern childhood is inevitably shaped by, shared on and processed via the internet. In fact, according to an Ofcom report last November, 5 to 15-year-olds spend an average of 15 hours online every week. Despite its many huge advantages, the online world can sometimes seem like an unkind, unfriendly place. Challenges such as online bullying, children becoming addicted to gaming, and the consequences of constantly comparing yourself to your peers via their polished social media profiles are well-documented. To adequately support children and young people, as parents we must grapple with this space ourselves.

Whether you’re an adult or a child, when you’re going through a tough time, the smallest kind act from someone who cares can make a huge difference. That is why the upcoming Children’s Mental Health Week (6^th-12^th February), is focused on encouraging people to spread ‘a little kindness’. Simple as it sounds, small gestures can make a big difference. As parents and carers, you have a very important role to play in helping your child learn the value of kindness. Acknowledging kindness in our children, partners, family, and friends as well as those of fictional characters on TV and in books is an obvious place to start. Turning kindness into a challenge for the household with specific goals – such as 3 acts of kindness a day – and recording your experiences – using kindness jars, artwork, a family blog – can make it fun, too.

Scans of the brain suggest that altruistic behaviours are healthy for us, and kindness to ourselves causes ripples which benefit everyone. This is no different online. Tips like think before you type, report abusive language, know your friends’ boundaries and understand how tone can be misread, are useful. Cyberbullying can have an extremely serious effect on young people and it often starts with what is seen merely as harmless banter. The fact that this effect is invisible makes cyberbullying more likely to continue, so it is crucial that young people understand that their actions – anonymous or not – have an impact.

You can support your children by lending a listening ear, offering a helping hand, or telling them how much you appreciate them. Remember too that encouraging them to do the same for others – both in person and online – will equip them with the skills to help others through tough times, as well as themselves.

Sarah Kendrick is Head of Services for the South at Place2Be.

Download Place2Be’s free resources – including top tips for parents and children – and find out how you can get involved in Children’s Mental Health Week 2017 (6^th-12^th February) at www.childrensmentalhealthweek.org.uk

Place2Be is the UK's leading children's mental health charity providing in-school support and expert training to improve the emotional wellbeing of pupils, families, teachers and school staff. Our work enhances the wellbeing and prospects of children and their families by providing access to therapeutic and emotional support in schools, using a proven model backed up by research and training. Find out more at www.place2be.org.uk