Do You Have Mess Stress

Right now, I have three family members isolating at home with covid. I’ve had to move to the spare room to (try to) avoid catching it myself. Something has had to give this past week – dishes have piled up as I’ve tried to work in between checking on the children, making endless cups of tea for me and husband-with-covid, testing, taking any non-covid kids to and from school - all that many of you will have experienced too!

But the one thing I don’t have?

Mess Stress

82% of us have experienced ‘mess stress’ at some point, with nearly half (44%) reporting that they experienced it at least weekly, according to my 2021 Serenely Sorted® survey commissioned from Kantar. Mess Stress is that feeling of not being in control of the mess at home, having piles everywhere, the feeling of not being able to relax because of the piles and mess on our surfaces.

Whilst the dishwasher duties and surface wiping responsibilities have increased this week, because my home is organised in a realistic way into the Serenely Sorted System, I know that even in these crazy times, I can quickly get back to tidy in the evening and still have my ‘ahhhhh’ moment, and truly relax.

Deleting the Daily Debris

Removing the mess stress starts with tackling what I call the ‘daily debris’ – all the bits, pieces and piles that appear on our surfaces. It’s this daily debris that we can see that triggers thoughts about work or forgotten homework, those bits and pieces that niggle us in our line of sight as we attempt to sit down and switch off at the end of the day. It’s this daily debris we should always tackle first for maximum relaxation return – because I always think, why tackle what’s under the bed when it’s what I can see on my surfaces that causes me stress?

‘End Homes’ for Everything

The fundamental building blocks of the Serenely Sorted® System are ‘End Homes’. An End Home is a clearly defined place where a particular thing lives and always gets put back to after use. It might be a section in a drawer, or a small basket on a shelf. All of your things that end up on surfaces and prevent you from relaxing need to have clearly defined ‘End Homes’.

Because once they do, you no longer have to think about where to put them, so often the reason we brush things into a pile rather than put it away. Getting ‘Back to Tidy’ becomes so fast that it eventually doesn’t feel like tidying any more, and has you saving up to 2-3 hours a week.

Here are my five tips for beginning to delete the daily debris in your home:

If you have to work in the main living area, pack up your stuff at the end of the day

If you don’t have a designated working space and need to use the kitchen table, but then don’t clear it at the end of the day, it’s very difficult to switch off from work. I use a large tote bag for my work stuff – it fits laptop, notebooks, chargers etc. It’s very easy and quick then to both get this out and put it back in the bag at the end of the day. What I call the ‘Use-in-one-move’ approach. You avoid having to look at this work-specific ‘daily debris’ once work time is finished, and is so quick to do you won’t have the temptation to just leave it all out.

If you have kids, think mindfully about where the toys live

Toys are of course top of the daily debris list. I choose 2-3 of the most popular toy ‘categories’ to keep in the lounge or kitchen area and then all the rest live in the bedroom. Those chosen for the lounge/kitchen should have designated End Homes there e.g. a basket and always go back to at the end of the day. For example, we have a lego basket, a shelf for games/jigsaws and a craft cupboard in the kitchen.

Identify your top 3 mess makers

We’ve covered the work stuff and toys above, but there are many more mess makers! Start by looking at your daily use areas – the surfaces in your kitchen where the ‘Daily Debris’ builds up. Look at those surfaces – what’s on them? Is it your bag, your keys, a pile of paper, something else? List out your top three. Note there are two types of things on your surfaces, those that are there because you’ve done an activity right there (that work stuff) and those that you’ve plonked there when you get home.

Get into your daily ‘Back to Tidy’ routine

For the things you or the kids do at home – do it, have fun, get messy! Don’t stop life to keep tidy – the key is to know exactly where those things live so that at the end of the day, you can tidy up super-fast. It takes me around two minutes to get back to tidy in my kitchen at end of the day because I never have to think about where things go - never tempted to put things in a pile or leave it out. Create your end homes and even get the children themselves involved in the daily ‘Back to Tidy’ routine!

Begin thinking about your behaviour around your stuff and cut out the mess middleman

That’s the second type of stuff – things you tend to plonk down when you come in. Pick just one to start with and decide that it has an End Home. Here’s an example: Get a basket and put your handbag in it. Next time you go out, take it from that basket and – the important bit – put it straight back there when you get home – bypassing the kitchen worktop. Congratulations – you have justeliminated mess from your life!

Postscript: since I started writing this article I got covid too, so extra thankful for the end homes of calm in the covid-chaos!

Diana Spellman is the Realistic Home Organisation Expert and Founder of Serenely Sorted. With 20 years corporate experience in systems/process improvement, she used those skills to address the ‘Mess Stress’ in her own life after working from home meant she couldn’t get away from the piles that had built up over time – and created the unique Serenely Sorted®System. This realistic home organization approach combines efficiency with behaviour and mindset change and is achievable and sustainable for anyone – including the naturally messy! Diana works with with busy people in-person, virtually and via her online course to create End Homes and install the complete system into their homes, helping them save time, ditch the drudgery and get more peace – for the long term! Find out more at www.serenelysorted.com or book a discovery call to find out the best way for you to get started with the system. Follow Diana on Instagram at @serenely.sorted.