Sioux's blog: One Year Post Maternity

As some of you may know from my blog earlier in the year about Mum guilt, I returned from maternity in September of last year. A whole year ago. Where did that time go? I wanted to use this blog to reflect on some of the learnings and experiences I’ve had in the year since I’ve been back.

I am more than “just” mum

Part of going back to work was putting my “career” hat back on and returning to a group of people who had known me before I became a mum. It took going back to help me realise I was tying so much of my identity to being my son’s mum. All the friends I’d made at NCT and Baby College classes had me saved in their phones as “Arthur’s mum” and that had become all I considered myself. It was really helpful and liberating to have another identity again as Sioux the professional.

Bedtime is sacred

Managing the schedule of office days, social events, training courses and nursery runs is a constant juggle. My work are very understanding and I am fortunate that my husband also has a great deal of flexibility from his work and so together we’ve found a rhythm that works for us but one thing I have realised is really important to me is putting Arthur to bed. This time I have with him at the end of each day is so special and my compromise when trying to also attend work events is that, as much as I can, I am back for bedtime.

Colleagues care

My colleagues genuinely care about me, about my family and about my life. Sometimes I worried, was I oversharing or boring my team with stories of my home life but, just as I am interested in them, they were, and are, interested in me. I recently lost a beloved pet and the family and I were absolutely devastated. I was very emotional and my colleagues rallied around me so wonderfully to help me process what had happened and clubbed together for some surprise flowers to let me know they were thinking of me. It is these little acts of kindness that lift you up when your chips are down and I am lucky to work with the colleagues I do.

It does get easier

As mentioned in my previous blog, adjusting to being a full-time working mother was really tough at the start. The constant illness, the pressure to slot back into working at full capacity, the guilt, the diary management – it was all very overwhelming to begin with but it does get easier. I found I’ve slotted into a good routine that has room to flex as my home life and work life needs it to and as I’ve overcome more of the challenges, I’ve gained the confidence that I’ve got this. I feel now I am able to give the right attention and commitment to all parts of my life and the balancing act is working.

Sioux lives in a village outside Milton Keynes with her husband, young son, 3 cats and 2 dogs. When not managing the chaos of home, she works for a large housing association looking after health, wellbeing and engagement.