Ruban's blog: Summertime sadness

The summer is officially over and we can send the kids back to their jailors for a few hours while we attempt to remember the password to our work laptops. And yet it's deathly quiet….too quiet? I kinda miss them…I feel so lonely. What is happening?!

I am learning that summer holidays are very mixed bag of emotions. The start was full of hope and wonder as we embarked on a trip of a lifetime to Sri Lanka. With heritage from there, it was an opportunity to traverse the island and open their eyes to a different culture and grandparental history. It was a welcome, and much needed, break from the routine and reinvigorated my two sons and strengthened their bond.

The middle was spent with a particularly deep shade of the holiday blues as we came home to the sound of riots and wondering whether we were welcomed back or needed to book a return flight. Then followed a mish mash of holiday camps, random days off, random days on, employing Netflix as the childminder, only to then sack them to be replaced by the newer, shinier Disney+. What time is bedtime now? There were many moments of fun, such as getting reacquainted with the unique humour of Despicable Me at the cinema, bouldering at the local climbing centre, and learning how to ride a bike! There were also moments of unforgiving Lego sessions, Haribo benders, and seemingly endless episodes of Bluey taunting me that I'm not putting life on hold to create whimsical creative play sessions with the kids.

The end seemed to drag as parent and child struggled in this structureless, lawless barren wasteland of the dregs of summer. What day is it? Who's looking after them? Who is mad enough to take them? Have I got enough annual leave? Our summer was made slightly more complicated with our youngest son starting Reception. The school went to great lengths to ensure a smooth transition by using the staggered introduction approach. This involved two days of one hour play sessions each, followed by the trickle of time added each day the following week as it concluded with a full day at school. It led to me making a wholehearted apology to my boss as I produced a poor impression of an employee, struggling to work out whether I should be picking up a child from school or attending a meeting (or sometimes both).

I had either forgotten, or more likely, underestimated the toll the summer holidays have on children and parents alike. Expecting kids to switch back from the holiday ‘free-for-all’ to the swiss timing structure of school and after school clubs at the flick of the switch seems like a futile and unfair exercise. Likewise, we, as parents, seem to be set up to fail with the juggle of work and kids during the seemingly never-ending summer holidays. It feels like a time to cherish and dread at the same time.  

And yet……I miss the summer holidays. What can I say? I guess I'm a sucker for punishment. See you next year.

Ruban is a husband to one amazing wife, father to two wonderful young boys, and a willing slave to all three. When he is not dancing around with a child on his shoulders or ferrying them around on piggyback, he can be seen attempting to kick footballs, save worlds on his Playstation and occasionally audit some things for a lucky City insurance firm

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• Families