Rachel's blog: “Live, Laugh, Love.”

My husband hates this phrase! It’s not my favourite either, but it cropped up in one of our conversations on our honeymoon recently and for some reason it’s stuck with me since.

I’ve no doubt you will have seen it as a coaster, a poster or some wall art in a hippy tourist shop somewhere or other. The motivational three-word slogan gained popularity in the late 2000’s but is thought to derive from a 1904 poem called “Success” by Bessie Anderson Stanley which begins:

“He [or she – my emphasis!] achieved success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much.”

And whilst the slogan is a bit twee for me, I can fully get behind it’s sentiment and I wanted to unpack it a little in this blog, if you’ll allow me.

Go into any bookshop or library and you’ll be bombarded with self-help books, look online and there’s a multitude of wellbeing social media accounts and podcasts, walk down the street and you’ll see yoga studios, fitness centres and smoothie bars. I love all that stuff and if you’ve read my previous blogs on WLC, you’ll have gathered that I relish the opportunity to deeply ponder things; to analyse myself and others and attempt to perform better, both in a work and personal context. But it strikes me that we (myself very much included!) sometimes go off the deep end in trying to achieve success and be better versions of ourselves and what I have realised I appreciate most about the phrase “live, laugh, love” is its simplicity.

Live

Perhaps like me, you spend more time than we’d like to admit thinking about the future – what’s up next for us and those we care about. Not to say that’s a bad thing – I’d suggest it’s great to look ahead and have a plan for our lives but I wonder if sometimes our culture overdoes it with the ‘next new thing’ ideology. I’m sure you can relate - no sooner have you bought a ‘new’ phone, than a newer version is available.

Sometimes I feel like life moves too fast to appreciate it. That’s where I think ‘live’ comes in.

Live is a verb, a ‘doing’ word; it’s happens in the present. To live requires our attention in this moment, right now.

I find it really challenging to actually live in the now, but I believe it’s so important for us to stop and smell the roses, as the saying goes – to take time to relax and enjoy the beauty of life, our relationships and the world around us, and to do so regularly. Hannah Brencher, a writer, speaker and mental health advocate I follow, talks a lot about ‘unplugged hours’, basically switching ourselves off from the swirling social media and online world that begs for our attention (and mostly gets what it wants from us). I love the idea of being fully free to be present in the moment and writing this blog has reminded me to be more intentional about it. I might start with an unplugged evening this week!

Laugh

I love to laugh! I was at Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place Festival over the summer and persuaded the friends I was with to join in one of the ‘laugher workshops’ – having never done anything like it before, we were all a little sceptical. Initially the forced laughing felt really awkward and silly, but as we enjoyed the enthusiasm of the laughter coach and let ourselves relax into it, a funny thing happened. Our forced laughter turned into genuine giggles and we had a great time!

We shouldn’t have been surprised really – I know it’s scientifically proven that laughing does us good! It’s a form of stress relief for starters, but has long term effects too, such as improving our immune system, relieving pain and improving our mood. And what I find remarkable is the effect our laughter can have on others – it’s contagious and once you get the giggles, it can be really hard to regain composure, especially in an inappropriate context, like a serious meeting at work.

Watch most small children and they find ridiculous things funny, laughing away to themselves. But they also make us laugh with them. Maybe we should channel our childish side more often and enjoy some deep belly laughs and reap the benefits it brings.

Love

This has been a year where love has taken a prominent place for me. Getting engaged in February and then, just six months later celebrating our wedding and going on honeymoon meant my head has been in all things love for some time. I can’t say I hate it either! There’s something about love that makes us smile – whether it’s an old couple holding hands on the bus, a dad besotted by his newborn or even some silly insta post with animals snuggled up together, we love to see love around us. Don’t get me wrong, it can be a painful sight if our own hearts are breaking or longing for that kind of love for ourselves – I’ve been there many a time personally – but I still think we can appreciate others’ love when we see it.

The dictionary explains love as ‘encompassing a range of strong and positive emotional and mental states’. It’s a powerful thing, love. It can take time to build but it can also be an immediate feeling – ‘you know when you know’ as they say.

However we individually feel it, I believe we all need love and the science backs me up. Love is considered to be one of our most basic needs, as essential as  food and water, and, like laughter does more for us than just making us feel happy. Being loved and loving others produces dopamine, encourages self-care and can even help us live longer!

So, maybe there is something to the slogan ‘live, laugh, love’ that we can lose sight of by dismissing it for being too twee. Maybe holistic success – the kind that I certainly aspire to having and looking back on when I’m old and grey – can be found in the simplistic.

May we all learn how to live well, laugh often and love much.

Rachel is a commercial property lawyer who has worked in a range of private practice firms as well as inhouse. Rachel sees great value in building legal community and the sharing of ideas, both to support more efficient working as well as prioritising wellbeing and satisfaction in our legal careers. She’s passionate about motivating and mobilising those around her to make a positive impact in the legal sector and the wider world. Rachel loves to travel and spends the occasional spare minute day-dreaming about her next adventure.

Tags:
• Wellbeing