Esther's blog: Psychologically speaking...

" "The UK’s company boardrooms are a rapidly changing place, with the percentage of women having doubled in the past four years to reach Lord Davies’ target of 25 per cent. Sure, men may still be in the majority, but the City is full of powerful women: movers and shakers, award-winners and influencers to be inspired by” trumpeted CityAM recently. 

In another context, I was recently at an academic seminar where the editor was challenged for his all male board and responded indignantly that he didn’t know what the fuss was - three out of seven authors had been women in the last issue.

These two vignettes brought to mind some of the stats given out in the last Citymothers & Cityfathers speaker event I chaired, where Caroline Criado-Perez (the feminist activist who championed keeping women on bank notes, amongst other high-profile campaigns) told us that some research studies had shown that if a man was in a group comprising 17% of women he would think the room was around half full of them, and if the figure was 33% he would think women the room were in the majority.

Of course these figures need further context to be fully interpreted and there may be other reasons for such an interpretation other than intrinsic male bias, but they are thought provoking nevertheless.  Caroline also referenced cases where bias might cost lives, such as when classic symptoms of heart disease are shown to derive from historical studies on men, or dosages of standard drugs such as statins have been determined predominantly by research on men, and women have a different tolerance to them.  To the extent we are capable of doing so without specialist knowledge, we need to keep a wary eye out for such bias, whilst celebrating progress made so far.  As one of the audience members commented, the state of affairs which assumes certain roles and stereotypes for women does no good for men either since many men are uncomfortable with assumptions made about them, too, for example unwillingness to parent or inexorable need to battle their way to the top. 

These sorts of issues raised here fall within the domain of social sciences and psychology, both of which I wish I knew more about, and my curiosity extends to another area related to psychology, cognitive behavioral therapy/coaching, which informs aspects of the coaching and mentoring work I do. 

So it was in that mode that I listened to another session recently, given by Helena Morrissey, CEO of Newton Investment Management, Founder of the 30% Club, who came to speak at WorkLife Central on her experiences of working in the City whilst managing her own career. 

To many of us, what she has achieved, with her large family and incredibly senior position, as well as also being extremely supportive to her fellow workers and managing to look completely unruffled on any occasion I’ve seen her personally, seems virtually beyond our achievement.

Yet when I reflected after the session on the hints she gave as to how she managed it, firstly they seemed eminently applicable to many different types of life, and secondly they seemed rooted (whether or not knowingly) in some of the best aspects of cognitive behavioural coaching.  So with her permission, but in my paraphrase, I share some of her insights with you:

• Perfection is rare, so don’t beat yourself up too much if you don’t achieve it.
• Don’t over think things
• Take one step at a time
• Try not to personalize criticism
• Every day is full of successes and failures.
• Everyone is human.
• Nurture things you believe in
• Really prioritise what you feel is important
• Accept there are only so many hours in the day
• Try not to be always looking at the blackberry: live in the moment
• Seek different ways of looking at things by finding a trusted friend or mentor—everyone needs people to talk to.
• If you set out with only one aim, you would miss out on many opportunities.

I am going think of a good few of these today, and am sure they will improve my working day!"

Esther is a member of the Citymothers & Cityfathers Network Committee and runs the WorkLife Central mentoring scheme. She trained and first made her living as a musician and then worked for over two decades in the City, becoming a partner in her law firm. She now combines legal consultancy, executive coaching, performing the piano, teaching and two non-executive Board positions in what seems to have turned into a third, portfolio career.