Hayley's blog: It's ok to want to go back.

I'm looking forward to going back to work. I have to keep telling myself that it is ok. It doesn't make me a bad mum, it doesn't mean I haven't absolutely loved (almost) every minute of my maternity leave and it doesn't mean I won't be desperately looking forward to the next long weekend or holiday as much as the next person.  I just have to keep telling myself, it is ok to want to go back to work. However,  it does mean, it would seem, that everybody has an opinion on my choice to go back to work and they are not afraid to tell me!

Whether the person I am talking to is a parent or not, most people I speak to seem to think I am deluded, that I don't really know what I am talking about, and everybody tells me I will quickly change my mind come the dreaded date of my return!. These opinions are so common and so forceful that they have led me to change my response to the (now almost daily) question and I find myself qualifying my response and saying "I think I am" or "I'm not really sure how I feel." But, that's not true. I do know how I feel. I went to university for 4 years, trained for a 2 further years and have since spent another 6 years building up my career. I enjoy my job, I'm good at what I do and I want to continue to do it. I love my son, more than I honestly thought was possible, but I also whole-heartedly believe I am doing the right thing by going back to work.

And I know it will be hard and I'm sure nothing will really prepare me for that first week back, but I have a fantastic employer that has agreed to trial my suggested flexible working hours and an incredible husband that knows my son's routine as well as I do and so I am in a very fortunate starting position.

And as I start to count off the last few fun things I get to do as a mummy whilst still on maternity leave (today was my last trip to "baby land" courtesy of Baby Beeps) I have at the back of my mind the thought of a hot coffee and a Pret sandwich I can eat in peace..without sharing!

Hayley is returning to work as an Associate at a West End law firm, after having 10 months maternity leave with her first son.  She lives with her (very) supportive husband and gorgeous son and currently enjoys working 4 days a week