Citydad's blog: 10 reasons why...

Ten reasons why dads think they can't take time off to look after their kids (and ten reasons why they should)

1) My employer won't allow it.

Since April 2011, dads have been legally entitled to take Additional Paternity Leave (APL). Once the mum has taken the first six months, and returned to work, the dad can take as much of the remaining 12 months as he wants, up to the child's first birthday.

2) I can't afford it.

This is a fair comment, as once the wife's maternity pay and statutory pay is used up (39 weeks after the birth), then there's no income for dads. However, if you have any savings, then, in my opinion, there's no better way to spend them than watching your children grow. Also, the mum will have her income coming in.

3) I'm worried that when I go back to work I won't be in the same role.

You employer is legally bound to allow you to return to the same role and can't discriminate against you.

4) It will affect my career in the long run.

On the contrary, I'm pretty sure that after a few months back at work, your employer will almost have forgotten that you ever took the time off. However, YOU won't have forgotten, which means better staff retention for the employer! Additionally, don't underestimate the power of being a role model for other men.

5) My friends and family will think it’s strange.

I received only positive comments and praise when I took my four months of APL. I had a great response from everyone, including my son’s teachers and other mums (and my kids of course!).

6) Looking after kids is a little too feminine for me.

On the contrary, I think it's quite a masculine decision to "take charge" to ensure that your family is looked after. Also, I think it shows a level of male confidence to allow the wife to continue her career while yours is put on hold for a few months and you take on a different role with regards to childcare.

7) I'm not sure I can cope looking after a baby on my own.

Fair comment, and one I wondered about too, and although it's hard work, it's simply about establishing a routine and sticking to it. After the first couple of weeks, it will be "child's play". Sorry.

8) I'll go nuts being at home all day looking after a baby on my own.

Now you know how your wife feels! Another fair comment and, in fact, if you can (to help keep your sanity!), I recommend getting someone to take over for a few hours every now and again. Perhaps a local childminder. This will give you a bit of space for yourself which is always important.

9) Children need, and want, their mums more than their dads.

Children equally need and want their dads. My kids responded really well when I took time off to look after them. Even my son's teacher commented on how much my son enjoyed having his dad at home. Both children seemed to really enjoy it and I'm now as much a part of their lives as my wife is which makes me feel good too!

10) I'll be too out of touch with work by the time I return.

You're entitled to up to ten "keeping in touch" days during your time off. The actual number of days, what they will entail, and your pay will have to be agreed with your employer. I didn't use any of these, but you can if it suits you.

So, are you persuaded yet?

Citydad is a manager in the shipping industry who surprised his employers by asking for four months of paternity leave, after which he shocked them by requesting flexible working to continue to spend more time with his two children.