Esther's blog: Making a Stand

"In my last blog I asked 'When will men openly acknowledge school sports days, parents' evenings and picking up their children from school?'. Well, it certainly seems like I caught the spirit of the moment, with the same sentiment being trumpeted loud and clear at the recent launch of our companion to Citymothers, the  Cityfathers network. There is no point in paraphrasing Nick Clegg, our keynote speaker at the launch, when he put his main message so clearly.  He said: "We can make family-friendly working the new norm in Britain. This means making sure it is a genuine option for every employee in your organisation. . . . Together we can generate a once in a generation sea change across our offices, factories and other workplaces."  He was talking of the new shared parental leave proposals but it was acknowledged in the Q&A after his speech that changes need to be wider.  Men fear they will be stigmatised if they acknowledge at work that they share childcare and family responsibility. Many would like a change in ethos to acknowledge equal parental responsibly whether or not they would take up shared parental leave.

Leaving aside the main debate for a moment, I'd like to highlight one of his subsidiary comments, his dislike for the testosterone-fuelled baying for blood at Prime Minister's question time. I've often listened to this programme on the radio with horrified fascination.  How can we seriously expect our country to support gender equality when Westminster rings with such raucous aggression, which unfortunately also appears in the boardrooms and deal rooms in the City? As a senior partner in a large law firm, when I didn't tolerate aggression and domineering negotiating styles (not always the sole domain of men of course) I was considered daring, perhaps even a little rash, but I don't believe I lost work and I certainly didn't lose sleep over making a stand.

If this blog has a message rather than merely musing on an interesting, and massively important development in the Citymothers and now Cityfathers network, it is that if we all stand up regularly against unhelpful, gender-stereotyped behaviour in the work place, we can and will make a difference. If the 50 percent male audience for Nick Clegg's speech continue to attend Cityfathers events and put forward their views, that will help too."

Esther worked for over 20 years in the City, having originally been an academic musician.  She was a lawyer first at Linklaters then Clifford Chance, where she led her own group within the Banking and Capital Markets for many years. Esther sits on the Citymothers Committee.